


Team Fortress 2 (Various) x Reader

by Sycriad



Category: Team Fortress 2
Genre: Angst as well, Blood, F/M, Foreign Language, Genderneutral, I'm always tired, I'm too Ace for that oops, M/M, Mild Gore, No Smut, Oops, Platonic Female/Male Relationships, Platonic Male/Male Relationships, Prequels, Probably ooc, Profanity, Riddled with adolescent angst, Romantic Fluff, Swearing, This Is For You, Yea Gore definitely, and adorned with more cheese than your favourite take-out pizza, enjoy i suppose, fluff probably, fuck I dunno, gore probably, lavished with profanity, my bad - Freeform, sequels, this is on my wattpad too, two authors, uhhh, very slow updates
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-28
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-03-25 00:18:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13822488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sycriad/pseuds/Sycriad
Summary: Random shitty one-shots my (ex) SO and I wrotehave fun you animals





	1. Enseigne-moi anglais! (Spy x Foreign! Reader)

**Author's Note:**

> Teach Me English!  
> I'm taking French at school, so please let me do this. I know it would make more sense to make it so the Reader is learning French but this will give me the opportunity to use French more than if English was the Reader's native tongue. If that makes sense?  
> I'm still not very fluent and I'm using my notes from school for this  
> Please God if I insult someone native of France  
> Je Suis désolé {I'm sorry}  
> This one is gonna be short because I'm very sick and have a migraine  
> Merci beaucoup {Thank you very much}  
> {I will put translations in these parentheses}

"Je ne sais pas! {I don't know!}" They let out a huge sigh smacking their head against the table. Being a new edition to the team but indeed foreign, they needed to learn English in order to communicate with their other teammates. Who other than the one and only bilingual Frenchy himself would teach them? Despite him understanding how hard it is to learn a new language, he was still exasperated, to say the least. A gloved hand removed the cigarette tin from the pocket within his jacket. He flipped it open, taking out a cigarette, lighting it, and immediately taking a deep draw on it. Elegantly blowing smoke from the corner of his mouth, he placed the tin back in its rightful place. "Je Suis désolé(e). Je Suis tellement mauvais à ça! {I'm sorry! I'm so bad at that!}"

He sighed, "Ça prend du temps. {It takes time.}"

They groaned in response, looking down at the stack of notes in front of them. Shuffling between pages, (E/C) eyes searching the full pages, they can their own writing. "I-" They narrowed their eyes, "-am apal- ap- apolo-gies?"

"Apologies." He corrected, cracking a faint smile.

"Apologies" They repeated back slowly.

"Vous avez utilisé le mauvais mot. {You used the wrong word.}" They nodded slowly. "Maintenant répétez. {Now repeat.} I am sorry."

"I... am sorry?"

"Très bien. {Very good.}"

"J'ai une question {I have a question}." They looked up at him.

"Oui? {Yes?}"

"Pourquoi es-tu si formel {Why are you being so formal?}"

"C'est seulement poli. {It's only polite.}"

"Je ne suis pas ton supérieur. {I'm not your superior.}"

"Vous n'avez pas besoin d'être. Un gentleman est toujours poli. {You don't need to be. A gentleman is always polite.}"

"Je vois. {I see.}"

"Pouvons-nous continuer? {Shall we continue?}"

"Oui. {Yes.}"

And so the lesson continued on for a few more hours and they were started to get the hang of it. Sort of....

It was the end of the day and both parties were equally stressed out. Spy had told them that they could continue the next day, so they gathered their things and stood up.

They had rehearsed this in their head multiple times. "Thank you-" They racked their brain, "-for help- ing me..."

He nodded in approval and their face lit up. They grinned and scurried out of Spy's smoking room.


	2. Pent Up Anger (Scout x Reader)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Since Scout sucks his thumb during humiliation when you crouch, I decided to add a twist, since he has too much "self-confidence" in my opinion (by that, I mean his ego levels are too much through the roof to be a baby/seem weak about it. He has an image to uphold guys lol). And also he's the type to get super salty if he loses, yet it's never his fault since he thinks that he's too good and everyone else is a scrub.
> 
> BUT.  
> WHAT IF.  
> OK NOW HERE ME OUT.  
> HE ACTUALLY IS ANGRY AT HIMSELF RATHER THAN ANYONE ELSE AND HE THINKS OF HIMSELF AS THE SCRUB.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The class I created for the purpose of these stories is mine and mine alone. Do NOT use it without consulting me first. (No it is NOT an OC. I do not make fandom OCs.) This class will be used in most stories unless requested otherwise.
> 
> These stories, if not specified "x Male!Reader" or "x Female!Reader", will be gender neutral. All of them. Keep this in mind when reading through. I forgot to mention that earlier

**"OVERTIME."**

Good.

And in (Name's) team's favor.

Even better.

They just had to defend long enough for overtime to end and that meant keeping the other team away from the cap point. They, being a class meant to flank, were never on the front lines and always relied heavily on sneak attacks and the element of surprise, always sneaking up behind others and two tapping them in the back with their Winchester or stabbing someone with the bayonet that was attached to the end of it. If they did need to get out into the open they sometimes switched to their throwing knives and aimed for the eyes, then pounced like a predator onto prey and slit the enemy's throat. If things got even closer they would whip out their falx and not hesitate to get the blade dirty.

Very seldom did they ever find themselves back in the respawn room after an unfortunate loss in their favor. In other words, they rarely lost. In fact, their team thought of them as a great asset despite them being indifferent and uncaring towards winning or losing matches. They planned their routes carefully during humiliation and nobody ever managed to kill them while said period was in effect.

The familiar voice of the administrator rang clear. **"ALERT THE CONTROL POINT IS BEING CAPTURED."**

Oh, how (Name) utterly loathed that woman.

They tensed, head shooting over to the direction of the point to see how to take care of it. A Heavy & a Medic pair. A piece of cake. Scanning the area they looked to make sure there were no sentries or Snipers around before quickly dispatching the Medic and moving on to the Heavy. They threw their knives and as they swung their flax, got sent flying several feet away from the point. Once they hit the ground they looked over to see what had just unfolded. The opposing Scout had batted them away with his Sandman. A grunt escaped them as they stood, obviously winded. The Scout taunted at the breathless individual obviously egging them on. Unsheathing a knife from the holster hidden underneath their arms that wrapped around them similarly to the straps of a backpack, they threw it at the Scout, landing a blow right in the middle of his chest.

"Damn... I missed" They muttered, trying to steady their vision. They had aimed for his throat. Quickly jumping out of the way of an enemy Soldier's crit rocket, the vicenarian's eyes examined the area. They needed to get out of the open before they were killed.

 **"WE HAVE LOST THE CONTROL POINT."** The boos of defeat echoed. Once again their team lost. (E/C) eyes scanned they are and saw all of their teammates running around frantically trying not to get killed. As their gaze bounced off of all of the other members, they saw their thin Scout friend do his exaggerated arm swung run back to the respawn room, so they dizzily followed.

"Scout?" He was huddled in the corner, left hand clenching his hat, right thumb in his mouth. There was a hole in the wall next to him. "Scout."

He turned his head to the side. (Name) had never in their life seen him this angry. They put one small hand on his head, and the other on his shoulder, turning him away from the wall. His thumb was bleeding due to the nail being missing. He had torn it completely off in his fit of anger. The expression on his face was one of pure unbridled rage and his knuckles were white from clenching his fists so tightly. A sigh escaped their lips as they leaned over, unzipped the bag that he wore on his back, and pulled out a Bonk! Atomic Punch. The 'psst' of the air leaving the newly opened can softly reverberate off of the walls as they placed the can in his non-bleeding hand before zipping his bag back up.

"What's the matter. I've never seen you THIS angry after a loss." Scout's silence was the only response. They walked over to the supply cabinet against the wall and pulled out a roll of bandages and a bottle of antiseptic. "You're a dumbass y'know?" A (S/C) hand grabbed his and the light green liquid poured over his fingers. He hissed, earning a ginger nudge from the individual next to him. "Don't be a baby. We both know that you've had worse injuries than this." They blotted at it cautiously with a sterile pad before wrapping it and tucking the excess underneath the bandages that were already wrapped around his palms and wrists.

"Thanks..."

"No problem, now spill it."

He huffed to himself. "I ain't fast enough. Wasn't fast enough to beat my brodas and I'm not fast enough now. We lost 'cause I didn't-"

They held up a hand to stop him then socked him in the side of the head. "That's enough."

"Ow! What da hell?!"

"Listen here you, dummy. It's not your fault. It's the team's fault. Don't you dare blame yourself because it's all of our faults. We didn't go in as a team, we went in solo. That's on us. Everything's been so tense lately due to all of the consecutive losses that we didn't plan or act together. This isn't a one on one type of confrontation, it's a group effort and we can't win if we don't get our heads out of our asses and cooperate. There's strength in numbers and this isn't a time to get cocky and lose our minds, which is exactly what we did."

He took a minute to process their words, eyes wandering up to their face with lingering uncertainty. He opened his mouth to speak but couldn't find the right words. He paused. "W-"

Their gaze cuts him off. "Jeremy, it's alright that you weren't fast enough." He was taken aback by your use of his real name and relaxed slightly. "It doesn't matter, but as an added bonus you're the fastest person on the team." Small hands gripped his shoulders "You win some, you lose some. It happens and it's okay if you get frustrated but don't pin it up. Got it?"

He nodded slowly and they released him with a pained wheeze. "Ya good, Piercer?"

"Right as rain." They stood in order to make another trip to the supply cabinet. They grabbed a small blue bottle with a red plus on the label. "Nothing some painkiller won't fix." The downed the liquid inside. "Man that other Scout got me good."

"Did he bat ya off the point?"

"Yes, indeed good sir. Now it sounds like Humiliation is over. We can patch the hole in the wall up later, let's get some eats."

"Sure ding." He stood, chugging the Bonk! you had given him prior to your chat and crushed the can against his forehead. "WOO!"

"Glad to see you're feeling like your old self again."

"Yeah! Tanks for da pep talk, (Name)."

"Anytime. Now let's gooooo I'm starving."

He grabbed your hand and sprinted out of the respawn room and back to 2Fort where the two of you could pig out on junk food.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> rip me


	3. Not So Pent Up Anger (Scout x Reader)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well, this is a sequel to Pent Up Anger obviously. This was heavily requested on DeviantART before I deleted my account which I don't regret at all.   
> The only difference is that this time. The reader is the one mc-fucking TRIGGERED  
> Enjoy or something

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The class I created for the purpose of these stories is mine and mine alone. Do NOT use it without consulting me first. (No it is NOT an OC. I do not make fandom OCs.) This class will be used in most stories unless requested otherwise.
> 
> These stories, if not specified "x Male!Reader" or "x Female!Reader", will be gender neutral. All of them. Keep this in mind when reading through. I forgot to mention that earlier

"Are you serious?? Are you FUCKING SERIOUS??" (Name) was furious! They were beyond furious even! "HOW DARE THAT SON OF A BITCH!" The yells of the livid Piercer were more than enough for the closest mercenaries, whether teammates or opponents, to know that they had been defeated. Allies were shocked, enemies smirked. 

Their smirks, however, were soon wiped clean off, when the angry flank slammed open the overhead door to the respawn room which shook violently as it hit the ground again (denting it in the process). As soon as they turned the corner, everyone not only saw but felt their fury. They weren't even bothering to be sneaky as usual. 

"Where is he?" The words they spoke held a malice so strong that even the opposing heavy stopped in his tracks. Nobody said a word. "Answer. My FUCKING QUESTION." The enemy soldier (dumbly) fired at them, a crit rocket. Having sloppy accuracy, being the dumbass he is made it easy to avoid, especially by (Name's) standards. A (S/C) hand slowly pulled their Winchester from their back, and with loathing in their eyes, they slowly (almost agonizingly so) pointed it toward the soldier that fired at them. Within seconds, he was on the ground, his head blown clean off. "Fine. I'll find him myself." Immediately, they turned and shot a nearby Medic and Demoman, killing them both. "Capture. The. Point." was all that needed to be said before their team scurried off to get the winning capture. They slinked towards the area where the enemy sniper had the **AUDACITY** to **_FLANK AND CORNER_** them. That was THEIR job description, not HIS. They knew **exactly** where he was hiding once they turned the corner, and they weren't going to leave until they killed him. (Name) WAS NOT going to die again. 

They slinked towards the enemy respawn room, as their team finished capping the point. There was no overtime. Nobody dared to contest. Flinging the door open, without hesitation, they slaughtered the enemies that remained in their spawn room. Casually, they put their shotgun back in its rightful place and unsheathed their falx, spinning it weapon betwixt their fingers. They grabbed the "hiding" sniper by the collar, before immediately running him through with it.

"KNOW YOUR PLACE! YOU ARE A SNIPER NOT A FLANK! THAT IS MY JOB! STICK TO YOURS!" They stabbed him over and over and over, long after he was dead. Blood soaked their clothes, hair, and skin. It painted the walls, the floor, and especially their weapon.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Scout grabbed them, knocking their weapon away from them and held their arms behind their back in order to restrain them. They struggled, further angered by his actions. Leaning their head forward they brought it back as hard as they could and headbutt him. "Ah, dammit!" He dropped them and held his nose. (Name), dove for their weapon, swinging wildly but stopping mid-motion, realizing that it was their team's Scout. Despite seething with rage, they felt guilty for injuring him. 

They punched the nearest wall, cracking the concrete and scraping their fist. Once again their fist made contact with the wall, further breaking the stone. They went for a third strike, but Scout grabbed their wrist, still holding his nose with his other hand. Blood seeped out from under his fingers and dripped onto the floor. Ripping away from his grip, they slid down the wall and sat on the ground. They placed an elbow on one of their knees, resting their chin on their non-injured fist, before straightening out their other leg.  
"Overboard?" They huffed, still highly vexed.

"I woulda said dat you were fine until ya broke my nose."

"Hmph. Sorry about that." Despite not sounding like it, the apology was genuine, and Scout knew that. He also knew that (Name) RARELY ever got angry, but when they did they could get out of control. They helped him when he was in his funk, so he figured that he'd return the favor.

Wiping his bloody hands on his pants, he reached down to help them up, "Let's go back. Den we can chat about it." He rolled his eyes. "And get Medic to look at dat." He motioned to (Name)'s now most likely broken hand. They sighed and attempted to clench their fist but couldn’t. If their hand wasn’t broken then their some of their fingers most definitely were.

“Yea okay.” He helped them up and they made their way back to their base. The duo took their time going back so that (Name) would have some time to calm down.

“Hey, uh, Piercer?”

“Hm?”

“I tink dat dis is da angriest I’ve seen ya. I mean- we all croak. Is it dat bad?”

“I’m not made because I died. Actually, I take that back I am, but I’m mostly angry because that SNIPER flanked me. A sniper! A FUCKING SNIPER! He’s the last person that should be flanking. Yeah, moving around to find another perch is one thing, whatever, but straight up taking my routes that’s a sniper’s blind spot and decapitating me with his kukri is another. It was a back way. A place that normally only used by Piercers or even you, is not what I sniper should be doing. I get that it was my fault I wasn’t watching my back as well as I normally do but still. I just- I don’t know why I’m so angry- I-.” They ranted and raved until they were red in the face and then they let out another heavy sigh. “Anything here is fair game.” As normal, their anger dissipated into dejection. They ran a hand through their hair. “Sorry. I’m sorry. I lose my goddamn mind every time something like this happens. I get pissed and I take it out on you and the team and it always gets worse and I broke your nose this time. I’m always an asshole to everyone when this happens and I scared everyone even though that isn’t my intention. I mean it is but only when it comes to the other team, but I’m such a fucking bitch that-”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down dere.” He ceased their rambling and they looked up at him with regret but his expression remained firm. “Piercer, anger normal emotion, and if ya didn’t feel it ya’d be like one of dose machines we fight sometimes or somethin'. Uh….” He sought for words but is very inept with them and struggled with this kind of thing. “Ya have ya right ta be mad. We all get mad when we die, but dats all aparta dis gig, y’know? But anger can be a good ding can’t it? It makes ya more determined to win, yeah? I- I dunno I'm not good with dis...” He scratched the back of his neck. Truth be told, he was a lot more awkward when it came to (Name). They gave a chuckle, stopping in their track outside the door to the base. Scout stopped as well and looked back at them just in time for them to move forward and wrap their arms around his torso.

“Thanks, Jeremy.” His face up but he returned your gesture of affection.

“But I didn’t do anytin’.”

“You did enough and I think I’ll try to be better with my anger issues next time.”

It was his turn to chuckle and he ruffled their hair. “Do… ya wanna go watch some cartoons?”

“Hell yea.”

“Race ya!” He took off

“Hey! No fair! You had a head start!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oof


	4. Subtle Suspicions (Jealous!Engineer x Reader)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yea no I'm not gonna finish this I'm not really on the whole TF2 scene anymore

An inaudible huff escaped his lips as he stared with growing anger at the Scout who was flirting with them. Feet propped up on a box mostly filled with empty beer bottles, he tuned his guitar, a newly opened bottle of amber liquor resting next to him. He had been seated a little ways away in a foldable green chair, pretending not to notice the events unfolding in front of him. In actuality though, he was seething. He never thought of himself as the jealous type but he was most definitely proving himself wrong. Big time.

A glower crossed his expression at the pure pulchritudinous being that was (Name). He was thankful that his goggles hid the direction in which he was looking behind darkly tinted lenses.

(Name) snickered to themselves. Of course, they thought it was cute when Jeremy flirted with them- a futile action- but their heart lied in Dell's grasp. They knew not to let Jeremy go at it for long, figuring that their significant other would get jealous. Oh, how correct they were with that assumption... (It would seem that they knew more about, Dell than he knew about himself). Dell only grew angrier and more bitter as this continued.

Jeremy continued to flirt with his dear (Name) and no more of it was he gonna take. He stood up from his chair, knocking it backward in the process and made a beeline for (Name), his feet underneath him kicking up the pebbles and dust. He marched towards them, hands locked in tight fists, swinging beside him.

His lips were a thin line, wanting nothing more than to open his mouth and yell at his younger teammate. It took everything in his power not to do so. Taking one final stride towards them, he stopped beside them. Their (H/L), (H/C) hair framed their face perfectly, making their eyes glow with rich (E/C). As he reached them, he couldn't help but stare, slowly getting lost in the marvel. Blinking once, he stood up straight, reaching (Name)'s height as he did so. Bringing a tense hand over, he locked it around their hip, pulling them to his.

"Y'all mind if I dip in?" He asked, forcing a small smile. The grin on (Name)'s face sluggishly fell as his grip tightened on them. Looking over at him, their eyebrows folded, not confused, but worried. They knew he was sensitive, they knew they couldn't allow the flirting to come this far, and they knew this was their fault. He was pissed. They could see it on his face, despite the goggles shielding his eyes. A hint of guilt crept on them as they shifted their eyes away from him and to the ground.  
A short scoff exited the Scout's lips, a half smirk sticking out as he did so. "We're in da-"

"(Name), can I borrow ya for a little while?" He interrupted rudely. Letting out a long sigh, they closed their eyes and waited a moment, leaving him on his toes.  
"Of course." They replied uncharacteristically quiet, and with that Dell dragged them away from an agitated Scout. (Name) was reluctant to go with him though. They were ashamed that they let this go on right before their significant other's eyes. The only reason why they had allowed Jeremy to continue on with his actions, was due to the fact that it was amusing to watch him make a fool of himself. He did, after all, do that quite often. 

"Can ya help me with a project?"

"Sure thing, Engie."

He fished a rolled up blueprint out of his toolbox and unrolled it. It was neatly drawn and adorned with notes, measurements, and small details about spare parts.


End file.
